Elder Of Ziyon - Israel News: Preoccupied

Showing posts with label Preoccupied. Show all posts

Thursday, April 18, 2024

Israeli Democracy A Transparent Attempt To Distract From Tyranny (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

Cambridge, MA, April 18 - Human rights activists warned today that the growing likelihood of the Jewish State holding new parliamentary elections this fall constitutes a blatant attempt to mask the dictatorial nature of the governmental system.

Harvard Fellow and former Executive Director of Human Rights Watch Kenneth Roth joined a number of colleagues to decry Israel's use of its democracy to distract from its lack of democracy and its oppressive, tyrannical state. In an open letter published in The New York Times and the Washington Post, the activists described Israel's Opposition Leader Benny Ganz's call for early elections "a transparent attempt to divert the world's attention from Israel's failure to uphold democratic norms."

Israel has held elections on average about every two years since about 2005, even though the standard legislative term lasts a little more than four years, owing to a fractured electorate that yields only the narrowest majorities for successive unstable coalitions. The writers called the democratic elections a mere cosmetic feature of the system, the same characterization that they gave Israel's independent judiciary, rule of law, religious freedom, freedom of expression, and other hallmarks of democratic societies.

"It has been clear for a long time that when Israel adheres to policies and institutions of democracy," the writers also wrote, "they do so not because it values democracy or those institutions, but only as cover for the nefarious depredations of Zionism and supremacy. This is a well-established principle in evaluating the legitimacy of Israel's behavior. Wherever one can posit a dark ulterior motive, it becomes the default assumption of what drives that behavior or policy."

Roth and his colleagues from Amnesty International, Médecins Sans Frontières, the International Committee of the Red Cross, the World Health Organization, and twelve other human and civil rights groups also cited the well-known model of "pinkwashing" as precedent: the established assumption on the part of activists that Israel's openness to, even celebration of, LGBTQ people - with Tel Aviv hosting by far the largest Pride Parade in the Middle East - stems not from genuine care and tolerance but from a desire to distract from the country's true evil nature.

"Given these axioms about Israel, the world must treat so-called Israeli democracy accordingly," the letter concluded. "Until Palestinians are free to replace Israeli democracy by whatever means necessary with a violent repressive homophobic misogynistic Islamist theocracy pursuing global genocidal Islamic supremacism, Israel cannot honestly call itself a democracy."

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Teen's Room Proves Rich Archaeological Trove During Passover Cleaning (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

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Efrat, April 14 - A local mother alerted the Israel Antiquities Authority today upon discovering what could only be ancient treasures under the detritus and dust in her adolescent son's domicile, the Jerusalem Post reported today.

Hannah Cohen, 42, contacted the IAA shortly after beginning the task of cleaning Adir Cohen's room in advance of the Passover holiday, which begins Monday evening next week. "The moment I saw the amount of dust accumulated on the furniture and some of the other stuff in the room, I knew I had to call in some experts. I didn't want to disturb anything of value," she told the Post.

Cohen disclosed that she repeatedly admonished Adir to clean his room over the last year. "Might as well have been asking Palestinian terrorists not to rape and murder," she lamented with a shake of the head.

Antiquities Authority representatives declined to say whether any of the objects from the bedroom qualify as artifacts. "It is certainly too early to announce anything," cautioned IAA spokesman T. Peshesray. "We do not wish to make any premature pronouncements, not least because it would invite scavengers and unwelcome guests unlikely to show proper care and reverence for the site. We do not want them poking around where other finds might still await discovery. Also, Mrs. Cohen will chew their ears off, and not just about leaving the room a mess. So it's for everyone's benefit that we make our investigations first, and, only once we are certain of the provenance of various artifacts, notify that public whether we have found anything of note."

In a separate phone call, Hannah Cohen described the process that led her to contact the IAA. "I wasn't prepared for the bardak I found," she recalled, using a word for turmoil, adopted into informal Hebrew from Russian, that literally translates as "whorehouse on fire." "The food wrappers and dirty dishes were bad enough. But do you know the last time he changed his bedsheets? Probably sometime during the Mameluk era (1260-1516). I might have to throw them out."

"Don't even get me started on the laundry and dirt," she continued, clearly not in need of someone to get her started. "It was the dirt and dust that made me think of calling the Antiquities Authority in the first place. I know this place was clean a year ago, but you wouldn't know it from looking at it now. I swear, that boy and his stuff attract dirt at a hundred times the normal dust accumulation rate. The Ark of the Covenant could be under there somewhere, if it weren't in some Nevada warehouse."

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So Cute: You Think Violent Pro-Palestine Activism Aims To Generate Sympathy (PreOccupied Territory)

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So Cute: You Think Violent Pro-Palestine Activism Aims To Generate Sympathy

by Aisaq Samqaq, Students for Justice in Palestine, Vanderbilt University Chapter

Nashville, April 4 - It's been months since October 7 and my gleeful reaction to it, but it's also been years and years that we in the pro-Palestine movement have made intimidation our methodology for policy change, and well-meaning, but I must say, naive AF, allies in progressive circles admonish us that glorying in the death and suffering of Jews, and threatening more of it for anyone who gets in the way, will only alienate the American public, and drive them away from solidarity with the oppressed people of Palestine. These well-meaning allied fail to appreciate that the purpose of my activism, and of the larger pro-Palestine movement, is not to generate sympathy or solidarity, but to cow opponents into inaction and compliance.

The Islamist cause embraced and took over the Palestine cause long ago; Islamism, wherever possible, seeks not to portray Muslims as helpless victims, but as triumphant victors over the infidels. Yes, we welcome your efforts to portray Palestinians as victims of Israeli brutality, but only insofar as those efforts help us subdue all of western society. Note how quickly "Free Palestine!" devolves into antisemitic chants, graffiti, vandalism, and violence. And then it goes beyond the Jews to target anyone and anything we believe stands in the way of Islamic dominance, such as the American or British flags. It's adorable, the way you insist on seeing us as in need of your benevolent empowerment and protection.

Look at the Palestinian and ISIS flags all over London. Look at how Muslims attack Jews everywhere, and not the other other way around. Look at how our activists shut down Jewish - not just Zionist - events with shouting and threats. The evidence surrounds you; you practically drown in it. Yet somehow, you have convinced yourselves that you know us better than we know ourselves. It's charming, in a quaint way that invites condescension commensurate with the condescension implicit in your assumptions about Palestinians.

I used to think you acted like this out of fear, of wanting to be left alone while we targeting more prominent and obvious foes. That was fine with me; fear is the point. But of late, I harbor concerns that you do so out of empathetic cluelessness, and I confess that while the result, in the end, will be the same domination we exert over you when we do triumph, I still have nagging doubts that you will still think you're doing us a favor.

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Lethal Exchange: Study Finds US Police Brutality, Racism Learned From Hamas (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

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Minneapolis, March 28 - New research has upended a contentious and flimsy report from several years ago that falsely attributed American law enforcement excesses to anti-terrorism training with Israeli counterparts. The more recent, and more robust, research, published in this month's edition of the Harvard Law Review, instead identifies the major factor in the stateside phenomenon as Palestinian enforcement behavior against Palestinians, in turn sponsored by, and emulating, Iran and its proxies in the region.

The study found, in the words of the article, "a direct parallel between the violent, discriminatory phenomena that activists decried in United Stated policing vis-à-vis underprivileged minority communities, and the same phenomena as a consistent feature of so-called law enforcement in the Palestinian territories, principally the Gaza Strip but the Palestinian-controlled areas of the West Bank, as well." Nominally, Hamas controls the Gaza Strip where Israel's current military operations have not supplanted them, while the Fatah faction governs parts of the West Bank.

"Everything from outright racism against Africans to excessive force to arbitrary violence to institutional prioritizing of protecting the organization over any human or civil rights of the citizenry," the article noted.

In particular, the researchers noted the rampant and open discrimination in Gaza against Black Africans; the standard term in Palestinian Arabic for Blacks is "Abed," meaning "slave." De facto segregation and abuse characterize "official" treatment of Blacks in Gaza. The scholars also observed that the Arab Middle East remains one of the chief areas of the world where chattel slavery of Africans still exists; US police can only produce a pale imitation of that level of abuse.

Beyond race itself, the study also found the roots of American police brutality in the way Hamas enforcers treat ordinary Palestinians, that is, with total disregard for the humanity, let alone rights, of those ordinary Palestinians.

An earlier polemic that coined the term "Lethal Exchange" attributed American police brutality to tactics learned by US police forces when the latter studied counterterrorism methods and theories from Israelis experienced in the arena. The "study" made headlines and continues to be cited by race grifters and antisemites, but failed to demonstrate any connection between the training programs and any apparent manifestation of program content in encounters with criminal suspects.

The article predicts that the same "Lethal Exchange" propagandists who made the spurious link to Israel will seize on Palestinian police brutality as evidence that Israeli "occupation" has made Palestinian law enforcement so brutal and dehumanizing, which assumes that Arabs have always been peaceful peoples unknown for any conquests, wars, violence, or mistreatment of minorities.

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Good Faith Of Evangelical Support For Israel Questioned By People Allied With Actual Antisemites (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

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New York, March 21 - Anti-Zionist activists challenged Zionists again today over the latter's acceptance of funding and political assistance from groups that might have ulterior motives for their funding and advocacy on behalf of the Jewish State, also insisting that the anti-Zionists' own coalition with groups that traffic in classic anti-Jewish rhetoric means nothing.

On social media and in interviews, anti-Zionists decried Evangelical support for Israel as insincere. They argued that for many such Christians, support for Israel hinges on views of a reconstituted Israel as instrumental in bringing about an apocalyptic final battle, and does not stem from any great love for Jews as such. The same anti-Zionists, meanwhile, ally with acolytes of Louis Farrakhan, while insisting they have Jews' best interests at heart.

"It's all about sparking Armageddon," insisted Rafael Shimunov, a New York activist. "Those Evangelicals don't actually like Jews or want to protect them. I don't know why Zionists think the support they get from Evangelicals is offered in good faith. Those Christians have an agenda, and it isn't a Jewish one. It's not like our allies in the pro-Palestine movement, who are sincerely concerned for human rights for everyone. Their love for Jews is genuine. The fact that Jews somehow never end up deserving the same rights as anyone else is all the Zionists' fault, really."

A minority of Evangelical Christian Zionists in the US do cite eschatological motives for their support of Israel. The statistics fall short, however, of demonstrating that Armageddon animates the Zionism of anywhere near a majority of the demographic. The dominant rhetoric in Evangelical circles regarding Israel invokes the brotherhood that they feel for Jews, the values they see upheld by the Jewish nation-state, and, in many cases, sympathy for many generations of Jewish suffering under Christian rule.

Palestine activism, on the other hand, offers its constituents the moral purity and consistency of deeming the civil rights and safety of Jews contingent on not conflicting with anyone else's desires. No hidden agenda lurks behind the activism; Palestinian leaders and their allies in the West make little effort to disguise their genocidal ambitions, even if they make the occasional rhetorical nod toward universal human rights, for which Jews somehow never qualify.

At press time, Mr. Shimunov had yet to respond to an inquiry as to whether he believed Armageddon will happen, which could explain any rational hesitation about accepting Evangelical support, or did not believe, in which case he was invited to explain why it matters at all.

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Gazans Panic As US Airdrops Watermelons (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

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(I received a note from PreOccupied Territory with this story saying that it was written before the reported air drop mishap in Gaza. He said he was "not sure whether that makes publishing it funnier." It is far from the first time that his satire ended up becoming true. - EoZ)

Gazans Panic As US Airdrops Watermelons

Zaitoun, March 14 - Palestinians hoping to bypass Hamas's tight control of aid distribution in this embattled coastal territory by getting to the parachuted packages of food by American Air Force, only to discover to their horror today that the latest payload, in a misguided attempt to show solidarity with Palestinians with a new symbol of their struggle, contained mostly watermelons. Six Palestinians were killed and a dozen injured. The Air Force has promised an investigation. Gaza officials, who give the official Hamas line, will include the casualties in the count of innocents killed by Israel.

Aid distribution inside the Gaza Strip has proved a tough logistical nut to crack, experts noted, given the monopoly that the Islamist terrorist group maintains through its control of the major aid organizations operating there. Israel allows in hundreds of trucks per day, but those vehicles sit idle on the Gaza side of the border while Hamas hoards the supplies, distributing it only to cronies who then sell the goods to those in need. Deadly clashes and stampedes have occurred as a result, with Gazans attempting to reach the aid before Hamas thugs can seize it. American and Jordanian air drops of supplies have tried to address the situation, with limited success.

Last week, a State Department employee passed a suggestion to a colleague in the Pentagon that the US military demonstrate its support for the people of Palestine by showering them with watermelons. The watermelon became a symbol of Palestinian resistance to Israel in the wake of the October 7 massacre last year that saw Hamas invade southern Israel and slaughter 1200 people, among other atrocities. The fruit evokes the green, black, white, and red Palestinian flag, and celebrates the "cutting open" of Israeli security on that day. The watermelon features in social media handles and has become a new shorthand for support for Palestinian violence against Israel.

The suggestion moved through the ranks of military until approved by the chain of command, who requisitioned several tons of watermelon, loaded them onto cargo planes, and dropped them over areas of the Gaza Strip where locals might be able to collect them.

The USAF investigation will attempt to determine who gave the green light for the mission without verifying that the air dropped cargo had parachutes, and will set forth revamped protocols to ensure no such disaster occurs again, according to a statement by the Air Force.

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International Hamas Brigades Of Self-Immolators So Far Ineffective In Gaza War (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

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Washington, March 7 - Military analysts concluded this week that to date, the cadre of progressive warriors who light themselves on fire, killing or permanently disfiguring themselves, have a had no measurable impact on the ongoing military conflict between Israel an Hamas, despite significant expenditure of effort on the part of activists to frame the auto-auto da fé phenomenon as a demonstration of the pro-Palestinian position's nobility and power.

Nearly two weeks after a troubled US Air Force employee self-immolated in front of the Israeli embassy here, experts on armed conflict published an article in the journal Jane's that contrasts the hype and psychological warfare potential of faraway, impressionable, mentally ill people dousing themselves in gasoline and striking a match, with the reality on and under the ground in the Gaza Strip, where Israel continues to systematically dismantle Hamas's fighting capacity.

"Certain analysts probably let their biases get in the way of their initial assessments," allowed one expert quoted in the article. "I daresay previous confrontations between Gaza's armed groups and the IDF established certain expectations for both how fighting is conducted in dense urban spaces and what pressure the international outcry against harm to civilians comes to bear against Israel amid the inevitable civilian casualty reports. People lighting themselves on fire to protest 'genocide' might not have been an important feature of previous rounds of fighting, but those episodes created framework for understanding the dynamic in way that reinforced the preconceived notions about international outcry against Israel and the impact of that outrage on the intensity and duration of the fighting."

The article explores the assumption behind numerous faulty analyses of, and predictions regarding, the conflict since October 7, that emotionally unwell people consuming too much anti-Israel propaganda thousands of miles from the conflict zone and deciding to demonstrate their displeasure by publicly killing themselves in one of the most drawn-out, painful ways possible would move the so-called international community to prevent further "genocide of Palestinians."

It attributes some of the erroneous thinking to the notorious Palestinian use of suicide attackers. "Perhaps some observers confused the offensive use of suicide with the kind intended as virtue-signaling," the authors suggested. "One way in which the mistaken approach might prove correct, however, involves a hypothetical expansion of the phenomenon: if enough supporters of 'free Palestine' follow the example of their self-immolating comrades in the movement, that would bring the end of the conflict closer, as it would remove a sizeable portion of those whose agitation prevents Western and American elected officials from facilitating a decisive Israeli victory."

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Leaders Who Dislike Bibi Also Ensuring Israelis Will Reelect Bibi (PreOccupied Territory)

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Washington, February 29 - Heads of nations who for years have blamed Binyamin Netanyahu for stifling prospects for a peaceful, long-term solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict continued this week to speak and act in ways that all but guarantee the embattled prime minister will secure another term in office when the time comes, since their rhetoric and decisions play into Netanyahu's established image as an unabashed fighter for Israeli security in the face of unjust opposition.

Netanyahu, who has stood at the helm of Israeli politics for almost all of the last fifteen years, faced a deepening crisis of confidence with voters following the systemic failure of intelligence and preparedness of October 7 and sparking the current war against Hamas in the Gaza Strip. His persistent legal troubles, a fizzled attempt to reform the judiciary, and a well-funded opposition protest movement had eroded much of his popular support, even if no single credible alternative leader had yet to emerge. In the meantime, internationally, proponents of deep Israeli concessions to Palestinian demands expressed continual frustration at Netanyahu's refusal to play along with the notion that Palestinians would be ready for peace anytime soon, and many of those global leaders openly spoke of sidelining or ousting him, at least by empowering or funding the opposition.

His administration's prosecution of Operation Iron Swords, however, put the domestic political concerns in abeyance while Israel came together to fight the enemy of the moment - Iran-backed Hamas and Hezbollah. Netanyahu's much-forecasted political doom became something of a consensus prospect in Israel - until the continued international pressure to reward the terrorism of October 7 with concessions came to bear on the Jewish State, allowing Bibi to position himself once again as standing in the breach against a hostile international community that refuses to take Israel's security concerns seriously.

For example, reports of a leak several weeks ago from the US State Department that the Biden Administration intends to recognize a Palestinian state with East Jerusalem as its capital, whether true or not, galvanized Israelis in a way that only the war effort had been able to achieve until now. Some analysts expected the opposition to seize on the reports as evidence that Netanyahu's decisions have alienated the country's most important ally, but those expectations failed to materialize; Israeli voters, united in a more bunker-like mentality, instead blamed American and global naivety and rallied together instead of against Netanyahu; even the center-left elements of his wartime unity coalition rejected the purported move.

In response to these internal Israeli political developments, international opponents of Netanyahu prepared further moves to prove him correct.

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Kids Perform Daring Rescue Of Hostage Snacks From Dad's Closet (PreOccupied Territory)

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Yeroham, February 22 - A group of elite members of the Va'aknin household infiltrated their parents' bedroom while the latter lay sleeping, noiselessly opened the cabinet where candy lay sequestered in punishment for fabricated offenses, liberated the contraband, and emerged from the premises while suffering only minor injuries, family sources reported today.

Adi, Moshe, Yair, and Hodaya Va'aknin, ages 8-15, staged a clandestine operation last night to rescue the chocolate, lollipops, and caramel chews that Mr. Va'aknin had confiscated from them two days ago after believing a false report regarding his children's behavior at school. Adi and Moshe briefed reporters this morning following the success of the extraction and the safe ensconcing of the sweets in a secure location that the senior Va'aknin will never find, the children assured journalists.

"It was imperative that we conduct this operation, and I commend all involved for their courage and professionalism," stated Hodaya. "We have known about the location of the imprisoned snacks almost since the beginning. We had a plan in place for some time already to liberate them - but to work best it required the right set of circumstances. Last night the right set of circumstances fell into place."

According to information the children disclosed, the raid began with a discreet scouting mission at around 10 pm. Parents Adelle and Daniel had sent the younger four - which included a four-year-old and six-year-old not involved in the mission - to bed. The eight-year-old kept his mother distracted with complaints of discomfort while an older sibling occupied their father with questions about ominous noises from one of the toilets. These diversions enabled yet another sibling to scout the master bedroom and confirm the exact location of the mission quarry - and, if time permitted, to attempt an extraction.

However, a lookout posted outside the bathroom alerted the scout of Mr. Va'aknin's imminent return, and the team settled in for Plan B. "Plan A was never considered realistic," acknowledged Moshe. "It wouldn't take long for Abba to determine we were only hearing normal tank-refilling noises."

Thus, the older children pretended to go to bed, when in reality one of them had positioned herself with her bedroom door cracked open, lights off, to monitor her parents' movements and launch the second phase of the mission. At 11 pm, the lights went off in the kitchen, then living room, as Adelle and Daniel readied themselves for bed. Hodaya listened for the sounds of the toilet flushing twice, knowing that indicated both adults would soon lie horizontal. She woke and alerted the other three, who tiptoed to just outside the master bedroom and listened.

Earlier, Yair had switched their parents' dinnertime coffee for decaf.

The team ascertained that their mother's breathing had slowed, and that their father's snores had assumed its deep-sleep rhythm, data gleaned from previous scouting missions. An unfolded, three-step ladder with rubber feet was brought from the kitchen. The team worked slowly but quietly to open the bedroom door.

The children recalled barely breathing as one of them - they declined to disclose which one - made a daring foray into the master bedroom, carrying the ladder and placing it in front of Dad's closet. Bare feet sounded like booms to the anxious observers, but did not noticeably alter the sleep of the recumbent couple just a meter away.

Another two children tiptoed into the room to form a relay team to which the point man handed each item, with extreme care not to crinkle any of the plastic wrapping. Inside of four harrowing minutes, the entire stash of captive treats had exited the room. The stepladder returned to its original location. The treats were taken to the bedroom of the two youngest, uninvolved children, and stowed inconspicuously for subsequent retrieval.

Children everywhere cheered the successful mission and the blow it struck for justice. "This is the moral boost we desperately needed," gushed Tony Gutierrez, a children's rights activist.

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Madrassa Instructor Caught Pleasuring Himself To Pics Of IDF Troops In Diapers (PreOccupied Territory)

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Jerusalem, February 15 - Scandal rocked a renowned Islamic seminary this week upon the discovery that a beloved instructor there habitually pleasures himself to images of Israeli soldiers who had humorously donned a shipment of absorbent disposable briefs that reached them by accident, sources within the seminary disclosed today.

Two members of that staff, who spoke on condition of anonymity, at the Mutaharish Aitfal Madrassa in Jerusalem's Moslem Quarter of the Old City, told reporters that a senior lecturer, whom they declined to name, was caught twice in the last two months masturbating to photographs of the IDF soldiers. The first time, the sources reported, the incident was dismissed as a one-time aberration or moment of weakness, but following the second time, which, according to information from someone within the madrassa administration, involved the presence of minors, and resulted in the instructor's suspension, at least temporarily.

As Israel began mobilizing and preparing for its current operations in the Gaza Strip, following an October 7 invasion of southern Israel by Hamas that killed 1200 Israelis and involved mass rape and brutality as well as the abduction of Israelis as hostages, Israelis, as well as supporters abroad, contributed tons of supplies, gifts, treats, and equipment to the standing and reserve troops. One such shipment reached a group of soldiers who discovered that a mix-up had caused them to receive not helmets, body armor, snacks, socks, underwear, children's letters, or gift cards, but adult diapers.

The unit in question decided to don the diapers and pose for a photo, which went viral among two separate audiences online: people who appreciated the humor in making light of an awkward situation, and anti-Israel users who enjoy depicting as helpless babies the soldiers who have by now destroyed two thirds of Hamas's fighting capacity in the Gaza Strip - killing, capturing, or incapacitating about 20,000 fighters - for a loss of only several hundred IDF soldiers.

The madrassa instructor's behavior has challenged the institution's administration and the surrounding community, which both take a hard pro-Palestinian stance. "The parents found out and are furious," acknowledged one of the sources. "Less so because of the minors being exposed to the masturbation - they were just the kids of staff, and nobody cares about them - and more because of the shame of this paragon, this mentor, getting aroused by... that stuff."

"I mean, if it were actual kids, or goats, no one would mind."

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UNRWA To Address Funding Cuts By Holding Bake Sale Using Stolen Aid Flour (PreOccupied Territory)

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Rafah, February 8 - The United Nations Relief and Works Agency for Palestine Refugees announced today a raft of measures to meet the challenges inherent in the organization losing much of its budget by the end of this month because of ties to terrorism, measures that will include an event or series of events in which Gazans will prepare cakes, pastries, and other confections, and market them to passers-by, with the proceeds helping to cover some of the hundreds of millions in shortfall. The supplies for the event will come from the organization's own Hamas-run warehouses, where the goods are kept safe from the Gaza residents who might otherwise obtain them for free, as intended.

The United States, the European Commission, Austria, Iceland, Estonia, Latvia, Australia, and Lithuania, among others, declared a suspension of funding UNRWA unless and until the body undergoes an overhaul of its policies, culture, and procedures, in the wake of damning evidence that not only did some UNRWA staff participate in the atrocities of October 7 last year, numerous employees have direct Hamas associations, with half the workers connected to the terrorist group through family. Video and documentary evidence also shows that thousands of UNRWA teachers, for example, celebrate terrorism, and that nothing the organization does in the Gaza Strip can happen without approval and direction from Hamas itself, which appropriates aid goods and funds for its own purposes.

Analysts see the bake sale announcement as an extension of existing Hamas-UNRWA practices. "The UNRWA-provided foodstuffs are meant to be distributed to Gaza residents," explained Matan Shetten of the RAND Corporation. "But no one gets it free except the well-connected among Hamas itself. Everyone else has to buy it. It's even sold at retail in supermarkets. So what we have here with the bake sale is more of the same: Hamas-UNRWA extracting every last shekel from ordinary Palestinians, and letting only the barest amount of aid of any kind trickle down to the people."

"Who's going to buy the cakes - Egypt?" he continued. "No, the only people in Gaza are Gazans; Israeli soldiers, who wouldn't be interested; and Israeli hostages of Hamas, who have no access to the bake sale or money with which to buy anything. That just means more money siphoned away from the people who need it most."

A spokeswoman for UNRWA continued to insist today that every bag of flour is strictly audited and controlled.

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With No Nearby Cancer Hospital or Synagogue, Palestine Activists Lack Protest Venue (PreOccupied Territory)

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Berkeley, February 1 - A coalition of groups that sought to demonstrate solidarity with the people of the Gaza Strip and to showcase their vehement opposition to the nation-state of the Jews defending themselves from Gazans, acknowledged today that they felt stymied by circumstances that deprive them of a suitable place in the vicinity for their demonstration, such as a prestigious cancer-treatment and research facility, or a Jewish house of worship.

Members of local chapters of Students for Justice in Palestine, Jewish Voice for Peace, If Not Now, and the Committee on American-Islamic Relations, among others, expressed their frustration Thursday that the area lacks a high-profile medical facility that may or may not have accepted generous donations from people who have also donated to Zionist causes, and that the only synagogue they can locate lies far away from any convenient gathering venue - meaning that the activists have nowhere to convene, disrupt traffic, chant antisemitic slogans, and bully passers-by or those in the facilities, in the name of Palestine.

"We're not New York, I know that," admitted Nerdi Kissassi, the coordinator of the would-be demonstration. "New York has both synagogues in large numbers, unfortunately, and top-flight cancer treatment centers. We don't have anything comparable in northern California. That means our avenues for expression of solidarity with Palestine, and to glorify resistance to the Zionists by any means, are much more limited. We can't hope to make headlines the same way."

She noted that some enterprising activists had targeted Jewish cemeteries and institutions with vandalism and pro-Palestine graffiti, but that failed to garner the desired attention and caused a backlash among locals. "You've got to go big if you're going to play the intimidation game, which is the nature of Palestine activism in the west," she explained. "Playing on people's sympathy will only get you so far, because all the Zionist propagandists have to do is show images of October 7 and all our efforts are wasted. No, we need to scare into silence or inaction those who would otherwise try to speak out for, or protect, Jews, regardless of where their sympathies lie. Unfortunately for us, the Bay Area doesn't have any major Jewish institutions of global, or even national, stature, and we're not going to get air time or news coverage by shouting, 'From the River to the Sea, Palestine will be free!' outside an abortion clinic or random day care center. It's a serious problem for us."

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